It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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