Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
