Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
