Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm bleeding and have questions
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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