I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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