I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize