loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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