But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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