The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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