brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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