I wish I only lived at night.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
what day is it and did you see me today?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
