Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
