Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize