If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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