why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
