beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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