She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
No more Irish car bombs ever.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
