are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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