I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
