I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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