i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
