thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
