even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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