So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Randomize
