his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
