Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
vagina is talking i cant
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
There r osticjed everywhere
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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