dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
