This is not my ceiling
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize