some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
oh god the rape fog is back!
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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