BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
We have started to decorate penises.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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