I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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