; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
