I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
