Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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