I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
