I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
