Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
