I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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