It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
