So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
i now understand why vodka
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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