jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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