she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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