so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I'm having to shit out rocks
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
