Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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