He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
