the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
