This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
