go do what you do best...puke behind churches
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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