How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
