No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
