is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
My bed smells like the plague
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
